Lex and Light
by Trisforce
Summary: Crossover of Croak by Gina Damico and the Death Note anime. What will Lexington do after she meets the legendary Kira, Light? Will she find a way to get her hands on the imaginary Death Note, or will she just claim that the Yagami man is schizophrenic? And what will Light do in the Afterlife, after he see's all his victims? Lex/Driggs [after I watched ReLight 1 I can't finish so]


Croak and Death Note? Uhm, hell yes!

* * *

"What happened to this guy?" Lex asked, Killing the brunette below her.

"Hmmm. Seems as if he was shot, then died here." Driggs said, Culling him.

"Can I check out his name?" Lex said, glancing at her boyfriend next to her.

"I don't care." Driggs shrugged.

Lex dug into the man's pockets, pulling out an ID. "Light Yagami. So…he's Japanese. How odd. It also looks like he worked for the police. He's been here for a while, why hasn't anybody found him? It looks like he was engaged, also. So why? Was he _murdered?_" Lex asked Driggs.

"None of our concern. If you want, ask him. As _if _he'd give you the answers you want." Driggs scoffed. "It's time to go."

"Okay." Lex said, flipping her hair, pulling out her scythe.

* * *

"Hai gurrl haii!" Elysia said from behind her desk.

"Hey, blondie." Lex said, walking casually up to her. "Has that Light kid came into the Afterlife yet?"

"Just arrived. He looks so _stoic. _Like, being punished for something he didn't do." Elysia said, putting her hair in a ponytail.

"Strange." Lex said, walking into the Afterlife.

For the last few months, nothing has happened in Croak. Or to Lex. Well, other than her jumping onto the Hormonal Teenage Bandwagon, and dragging Driggs along. Everybody _but _them seemed to drift apart- other than Elysia and Ferbus. They got even closer. And closer. Until it was 'officially' official. Then they drifted again. Then they were back together. Everybody was annoyed by it. Although, nobody missed Zara, the only mission was to find her and get rid of her. But that was for the higher-ups, so the juniors just did their normal job. But it still pissed Lex off. Zara could get away with murder. Of her _sister, _Cordy. But she didn't disagree with Zara- but she couldn't stand to look at the bitch who tore her heart in half. Rarely, if ever, Lex would drop a call to her mom and dad, trying to get over their grieving.

The only way Lex could was to get completely _wasted _off of Yoricks or ride Driggs. But, whenever _that _happened, Mort was somewhere else.

When, if ever, was Mort out of his house?

Her other ways was to hang out in the Afterlife, chatting with Poe, or to jam out to Avenged Sevenfold, Five Finger Death Punch, and Evanescence. To her surprise, she actually made friends there- Edgar Allen Poe especially. And obviously. But, today, she hopes to make friends with that Light guy- she didn't know why.

* * *

"Ms. Bartleby!" Edgar said sarcastically as Lex walked her way in.

"Hey, Poe. I told you not to call me that." Lex smirked, sitting down, scanning the room.

"It's been a week since you last seen me- I forget things easily." Edgar said, putting his hands in his pockets. "Dammit, Abe! Stop taking my notepad!"

Edgar ran off into the Void, leaving Lex behind.

"Light. Light. Light." She repeated, looking around for the man she Killed earlier.

After about 5 minutes of scanning, she found the guy, holding an apple, studying it.

"…hello?" Lex asked, looking down at the man.

"Hello." The man named Light replied.

"…May I sit with you?" Lex asked.

"Sure." He said, scotching over to give Lex room. "What's your name?"

"Lexington. I prefer Lex." Lex said, adjusting her hair. "Yours?"

"Light. Light Yagami." He said, glancing back at the apple.

"Light…what's so special about that apple?" Lex asked, poking it, making it fall to the ground.

"This? Oh, it's a memory of what once was." Light replied with a sigh, kicking it away. "It's more of a drag, depressing story. My life."

"Would you like to talk about it? You're in the Afterlife- you've got nothing else to do." Lex said, watching the apple roll away.

"Explain my life story to a strange female? When hell freezes over." Light replied with a snarl.

"Well _sorry, _Mr. Defensive. Didn't mean to pick a bone with your dickhole of a personality." Lex frowned.

"Let me rephrase that. Strange and _rude _female." Light chuckled sarcastically.

"And _I'm _talking to an asshole. So," Lex started, kicking her foot up. "Are you going to make a friend or a foe today? Because either way, I'll play my part."

"You are so _lucky _I don't have my Death Note anymore, or else you'd be a goner." Light said weakly.

"Excuse me?" Lex asked, crossing her arms.

"Do you want to know how I got here?" Light asked rhetorically. "I'll tell you. In that case, I'd get that apple and a bottle of Jack. You'll be here for a while."

"Jack? Please, we've got Yoricks." Lex smirked for the first time in this whole conversation.

"Excuse me?" Light asked, scowling.

"I would be happy to explain myself." Lex smiled.

"Fine, I'll bite that. Flip a coin." Light suggested.

"Okay. Heads, I tell first. Tails, you tell first." Lex said, holding out a nickel.

"Tails _I _tell first and you buy me one of these Yoricks, missy." Light smiled.

"And heads you have to buy me some Jack." Lex smiled again.

She flipped it. Being heads first, she started talking. "Okay. My name is Lex Bartleby. I work here at Croak, with my uncle Mort and my boyfriend and partner Driggs, and we catch people's souls. _Dead _people's souls. I Kill them, Driggs's Culls people. And other than my job, which I love, my family…Well, mom and dad are home. My sister…she's dead. Somebody killed her." Lex choked.

"What's your view on killing murderers who have done wrong, if you don't mind me by asking?" Light asked.

"Murderers are a shame on society- I'm not supposed to say this, it's against my job, but I want to kill them all. Every. Single. Last. One. Of. Them. Fucking assholes. I've seen as young as toddler victims- it's fucking sickening and _cruel. _It makes me want vengeance." Lex replied, looking at her brand new black studded Converse Driggs bought her.

"I'm sorry that your sister was murdered, Lex." Light smiled. "But it's _my _turn to speak."

"Okay, hit me, Light." Lex smirked.

"My name's Light Yagami. When I was in school, I was a straight A student. One day in high school, a notebook fell from the sky. I picked it up. It was a Death Note. Next thing _I _know, I have this Shinigami following me, telling me to use it. The book granted the holder to kill anybody they wanted- I being of sound mind, killed murderers."

"Are you serious? _That's _why my job got so much harder. And Zara still killed people." Lex said lightly.

"Yes, I'm being dead serious. Anyways, long story short, a detective named L was after me, we became friends, I killed him, blah blah. Within that time, I met my to-be wife, Misa, and she also had a death note and special eyes to see people's names over their heads, in trade for half of her life. She did that a few times. I'm surprised she out-lived me. Probably because I erased her memory. Anyways, L died, and I lived about half a decade just killing the shame of society. Randomly, his successors, Mello and Near, or Mello and N, tried to catch me. I had some fun with both L and N. And Near did what L never could, Nate, or Near, managed to beat me. My fellow officer at the police force shot me. I ran away, dying in that warehouse. And now I'm here. Which I'm not supposed to be- I'm supposed to be in Nothingness. I guess I can thank you and your boyfriend for that. So thank you."

"I'm sorry, Light." Lex sighed, looking around. "Can I ask you about the apple?"

"Shinigamis _love _apples." Light chuckled. "I wonder what Nate is doing. Probably playing with Legos."

"Look at the time! You owe me Jack." Lex chuckled.

"I can't exit." Light said, sighing at the door.

"You have to pay me." Lex smirked. "Give me cash."

Light pulled out his wallet, handing Lex some yen.

"I can't use this. This is New York." Lex got up, crossing her arms.

"Well then, you're shit out of luck." Light smirked. "You must've known I was Japanese, and knew I couldn't leave. So, Lex. Looks like. You're. Shit. Out. Of. Luck."

"Go fuck yourself." Lex frowned, walking away, glancing at the Void.

"I wish I could walk in there. Say hi to my sister, Cordy, and tell Edgar Allen Poe I have his notepad. Who knows? You might even see that L guy in there. He had black hair and bad stance, right? Yeah. I know him, thanks to you. I just wasn't curious enough to meddle in his life. Who would know you two knew each other? Small world." Lex walked off.

"Wait! Lex!" Light said, just barely missing her as she walked off into the real world.

"Meet him?" Ferbus asked, looking up from his computer.

"Yeah. He's…_interesting._" Lex said.

"Better not get too _interesting _or else I'll have to beat him." Driggs said. "Besides, what do you want with him?"

Lex was contradicting telling her boyfriend the truth. She _wanted _a Death Note. But that's _insane. _They don't exist! But…do they? "…Nothing. I was just curious."

"Fine. Besides, I need a Yorick." Driggs said, pulling Lex away.

"Fine, fine." Lex smiled.

* * *

"What's your plan for tonight, D-Bag?" Lex smiled, sipping on her last Yorick.

"Remember that one time that Mort left his house and you squealed 'give me all the D-riggs?'"

"Will you let that go? Jesus. Say one turn off line and you get labeled for life." Lex smirked.

"Yes, you do. Anyways, I was thinking. Mort's gone." Driggs winked, finishing off his last Yorick. "And you've only been in my room on occasions where we're _not _banging. So…wanna try my bed? It actually doesn't squeak like yours."

"Because a squeaky bed is _such _a turn off." Lex said. "Fine. Titanic boy."

"Corspe Bride."

"Golden Boy."

"Iron Maiden."

"Grim Heaper."

"Disney Princess."

"Anubis junkie."

"Okay, you can insult _Golden Boy, The World Ends with You, _and I can insult _Corpse Bride, _part _The World Ends with You, _part Iron Maiden, and _Disney, _but you can. Not! Insult _House of Anubis!_" Driggs half-yelled.

"What are you gonna do about it, huh?" Lex smirked.

"Make _you _plead for my name." Driggs smirked.

"You were going to do that anyways." Lex smiled back.

"I know."

* * *

Note: oh.


End file.
